Rise of the Planet of the Apes

I will start by saying I feel completely scarred by Rise of the Planet of the Apes. If you have pets/animals and love them, just don’t go see this film. I think I had more “fun” watching Schindler’s List! That isn’t to say it’s a bad film, but boy oh boy…*long exhalation*. Before I get ahead of myself, let me see if I can break it down. Note: I really hate writing the summary part of my reviews (and maybe it shows), so if you’d like a proper one, you might want to look elsewhere, but here goes nothing:

James Franco plays Will Rodman, a geneticist working for a huge pharmaceutical company in San Francisco who is working on a miracle drug to cure Alzheimer’s; something that is very personal to him. This cure involves the brain regrowing damaged cells. Drug trials on chimpanzees are underway and there are complications. These complications lead him to taking home one-day old  chimp Cesar for just a couple days. But Cesar shows signs of enhanced intelligence because his mother had been a test subject and had passed some special genes onto him in the womb. Those couple days turn into years as Cesar grows into  becoming  part son, part pet and part time patient of Rodman (and his father, played by John Lithgow). But we all know this is going to end badly and so it does and tragically, Cesar is separated from Will and is sent to a primate center (but not the good kind unfortunately). Cesar’s treatment in the center, his heart break over being “abandoned” by Will and seeing the state of his fellow apes forever changes Cesar. At first broken down, he finds new resolve. And these changes in him lead to changes in his fellow ape “prisoners” and as the title (and previews) show, they do indeed rise up.

I did not enjoy this film. I repeat, there was ZERO enjoyment. However, that isn’t to say it wasn’t both fascinating and thrilling. What I found fascinating was watching Cesar’s transformation (through more than a few tears on my part) and how he and the other apes began to form a cohesive unit, teaching each other, cooperating and strategizing on how to change their situation. Their hard-fought rising up against the system (and the bully primate-center owners) brings about the thrills as you can’t help but cheer them on. Watching Cesar, played by Andy Serkis (who wowed as Gollum in Lord of the Rings) is impressive; he once again brings life and emotion to a CGI special effect. Also watching the swarms of apes (including mountain gorillas and orangutans) as they break out of confinement and race to reach the redwood forests of northern California is suspenseful and definitely exciting.

I’m not sure if I can actually recommend this film but you may find this helpful: in my opinion there are 3 types of people who shouldn’t see this film:

1. Animal lovers – I reckon donations to PETA and animal adoptions will be up once folks watch this film. Harrowing, heart-breaking and infuriating, I suspect anyone who loves animals will find this nowhere near “enjoyable” to watch. Engrossing, yes. Enjoyable, no way.

2. Animal haters – For this group of cold-hearted folks (Michael Vick, I’m looking at you), you may be completely unaffected by what normal, warm-blooded people find difficult to watch. You may even secretly like what these apes have to go through but when the apes rise up and get their own back, YOU, my friend, will be squirming in your seats wondering if Karma really does exist (by the way it does and you're screwed). 

3. People who expect actors to act – I’m no expert but let me tell you, the acting was pre-e-e-e-e-tty lame. Excuse me while I direct the next sentence to James Franco directly:, “Dear James, I think you must’ve been on the same drug cocktail during the making of this film that you were during this year’s Academy Awards. You registered no emotion in either face or voice. You were sleep walking!”  In addition Freida Pinto could only look pretty (it’s not her fault, she just had nothing to do) and James Lithgow was completely wasted as Franco’s Alzheimer-stricken father.

So if you somehow are not in any of these categories, then I encourage you to go see Rise of the Planet of The Apes and let me know how you find it. In fact, even if you ignore my warnings and go see it (at your own peril), please also let me know what you think and if I can appropriately respond with, “I told ya so.”


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